I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas

When I was out shopping with my mom on Friday, by far my favorite thing about the holiday season took place...I heard the Hippopotamus song for the first time this year! My sophomore year in college, my roommate and I would turn this song up every time it came one (which was every morning at least!) If I could find this ring tone to download on my phone, I would. Jenn, this one's for you! =0) Merry Christmas!

I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas

I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a Hippopotamus will do
Don’t wanna a doll
No dinky-tinker toy
I want a hippopotamus
To play with and enjoy

I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
I don’t think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won’t have to use
A dirty chimney flue
Just bring him threw the front door
That’s the easiest thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning
Creeping down the stairs
Oh, a joy and what surprise
When I open up my eyes
To see a Hippo-Hero standing there

I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a Hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses
I only like Hippopotamuses
And Hippopotamuses like me too

Mom says a Hippo will eat me up, but then
Teacher says a Hippo is a vegetarian
There’s lots of room for him
In our two car garage
I’d feed him there, and wash him there, and give him his massage
I can see me now on Christmas morning
Creeping down the stairs
Oh, a joy and what surprise
When I open up my eyes
To see a Hippo-Hero standing there
I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a Hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinoceroseses
I only like Hippopotamuseses
And Hippopotamuses like me too

Mod Podge

This will probably be the most random of any of my random thoughts ever, but I don’t care, I’m sharing anyway! =0)
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STACEY

First, Lindsy and Grant both made mention of the Dictionary of Names site, so I decided to check it out. Not sure that was a good thing. Though fairly accurate, I don’t sound like a very pleasant person. That could explain a lot of things, though.

Your name of Stacey has created a practical, responsible, stable nature, and you desire to direct the efforts of others rather than to take order or ask permission. You have a determined, self-reliant, capable nature and resent any interference, although in your desire to help you are inclined to become involved in the lives and decisions of other people. You like to make your own decisions and to be the master of your domain. You feel a limitation in your own expression when it is necessary to reach another through tact and understanding. Although you are honest and fair, a directness in speech is a source of much consternation to you, and you often regret what you say. You also have a tendency to worry. It causes you to be too serious, and interferes with happiness and relaxation that comes with naturalness of expression. Health weaknesses centre in the head appearing as headaches, head colds, and eye, teeth, ear, or sinus problems.
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EVEN MORE RANDOM THOUGHTS

Here are some other thoughts that have gone through my head (or come out of my mouth) the last few days:

Taco Bueno has indefinitely stopped putting tomatoes on their menu items due to the hurricane in Florida. Though not the end of the world, one of the reasons I prefer Taco Bueno is because they put tomatoes on their tacos.

My life is pathetic because I spend 90% of my Friday nights in this manner: get off work (most likely late), go to the grocery store or run errands, go home and watch TV till I fall asleep (which is often before 10 p.m.). My Saturday’s are often the same, without the work part.

My life isn’t as pathetic as it seems because 1) I don’t have a cat and 2) I don’t dance with it! (Trying to think positive here!)

It is WRONG to start playing Christmas songs all day, every day on the radio before Thanksgiving. It’s even “wronger” to run head first into a Christmas tree when you’re going to change the server tapes (thank you Christian Services for this experience). =0)

Office Christmas parties are for the birds, which is why I’m boycotting mine this year. I have decided to just forego the whole process of praying I’ll get sick so that I don’t have to attend – I just told them I wouldn’t be attending this year. I hate the office Christmas party. It is the only time of the year I feel like it really SUCKS to be single. There are so many reasons for why I feel this way, so that might have to be a blog of its own.

Keith Urban is by far the sexiest man alive (but People Magazine didn’t ask me).

At this very moment, someone in my office is popping popcorn and it smells like a wet diaper. I want to puke!

Well, that’s it for today. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

The Quiz

Since I was feeling the need to change my blog entry, I’m taking a cue from Lindsy and posting one of these email survey’s I received yesterday.

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Stacey Kaye _______

2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING? black

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Teresa cleaning up her Sonic coke that she just split all over the floor & “You’re Still the One” on the radio.

4. WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Brown Sugar & Cinnamon Quaker Oatmeal Square

5. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? Sometimes. Hasn't worked yet.

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Blue

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW? Cold and foggy

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Some guy who is bringing a shuttle bus for our transportation ministry to look at.

9. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT YOU THIS? Of course (okay, with questions like this, are you really going to say no – but my answer was honest).

10. HOW OLD ARE YOU TODAY? 30, but 31 is too close for comfort.

11. FAVORITE DRINK? Grape Shasta

12. FAVORITE SPORT? Baseball

13. HAIR COLOR? Dark brown

14. WHO WOULD YOU MEET IF IT COULD BE ANYONE DEAD OR ALIVE? My Grandpa Wayne or my sister, Michelle.

15. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No

16. SIBLINGS: 1 - a brother, Brad

17. FAVORITE MONTH? December. I generally have the most time off work that month.

18. FAVORITE FOOD? BBQ

19. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Amelie (yes, I finally watched it! And what’s scary is that I AM Amelie!)

20. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? I don't think I have one.

21. WHAT DO YOU DO TO VENT ANGER? Walk it off.

22. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? Jenny Doll (This is what Jenny would look like if she hadn't been so loved. My Jenny's head is barely attached to her body). I was also a big fan of Barbie.

23. SUMMER OR Winter? Summer

24. HUGS OR KISSES? What are kisses? I'll have to go with hugs.


25. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Both - I like them mixed together.

26. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE/ E-MAIL BACK? Of course (again, are you really going to say no?)

27. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Rachel (though, at this point, she hasn't.)

28. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? This question is just wrong.

29. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS? Rent a condo with Jeana.

30. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Last night (7th Heaven was sad)

31. WHO IS THE FRIEND YOU HAVE HAD THE LONGEST? Melissa Nuss & Jill (Dietz) Blackwell. I’ve been friends with them both since the teen years.

32. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? Washed crock pots from BK the night before, unloaded the dish washer, put away my Halloween decorations, cleaned out the fogger machine, took out the trash, watched 7th Heaven & American Dreams, talked to And on the phone, and paid my bills.

33. FAVORITE SMELLS? Men's cologne or anything baking

34. WHAT INSPIRES YOU? People who can make the most of the worst situations and don't compromise their character in the process.

35. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? Ferris Wheels & not having any family left (being alone)

36. PLAIN, BUTTERED OR SALTED POPCORN? Buttered

37. FAVORITE CAR? What ever I can afford that won't break down.

38. FAVORITE FLOWER? Tulips & White Daisies

39. NUMBER OF KEYS ON YOUR KEY RING? 8

40. FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK? Thursday

41. WHAT DID YOU DO ON YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY? Spent it in bed - sick and without a voice. I had to postpone the celebration for a week.

42. HOW MANY STATES HAVE YOU LIVED IN? 2

43. HOW MANY CITIES HAVE YOU LIVED IN? 3 (if you consider Anthony a “city”).

44. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW? Crossing Jordan, American Dreams, 7th Heaven, Law & Order SVU, CSI, ER, Third Watch (my VCR is always running!)

45. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CARTOON CHARACTER? Dopey (but if Muppets count, then its Animal.)

Patsy

Only a select few are going to really find the humor in this, but today’s entry is about Patsy.

Patsy is our Onsite Property Manager. Actually her last name is the same as mine, so we’re pretty tight. She’s a nice lady, but she’ll talk your ear off so you better be prepared to be on the phone for a while if you call her with a problem. And don’t get her started on Bob. She doesn’t like Bob much. Bob is the manager for the Home Owner’s Association (takes care of the clubhouse, pool, etc.) Luckily Patsy and Bob both seem to like me, so I can get things done quicker than some (though I’m still waiting for someone to seal my windows so I don’t have cold air blowing in. Maybe today?)

The reason this entry is dedicated to Patsy is because of an observation I have recently made. For anyone living in The Crossings, you probably see Patsy pretty regularly. She’s always walking through the edition. I leave in the morning…she’s out walking. I come home at lunch…she’s out walking. I come home after work…she’s out walking. Even if I run home randomly during the day…she’s out walking. I ALWAYS see Patsy out walking. She has to be in excellent shape because I think that’s all she does all day. Walk and talk to people she meets along the way.

I like to walk, but I can’t imagine walking all day in that neighborhood. There’s no outlet and it’s not a big edition. There’s not a lot to see. I would get bored, but not Patsy. She’s always out walking.
So if you’re ever in the neighborhood and see a white haired (maybe it’s really light blonde) lady walking around – most likely wearing a visor…That’s Patsy. But don’t bother to try to get her attention. She probably won’t even notice you’re there (she gets very focused when she walks – must be something about the last name).

The Frog Man

Don’t ask me why, but I had some flashback to my younger days this weekend that reminded me of something I think I’ve tried to repress, but probably has a lot to do with why I have the “relationship issues” I have now.

What could be so traumatizing from my childhood that it still haunts me today? Three words “The Frog Man,” a.k.a. Frog Man Eddie or Eddie Ford.

Now I’m not being mean by calling him “The Frog Man.” This was a self-proclaimed nickname. You see, I met The Frog Man at my beloved Silver Maple Camp at the age of nine. For those not familiar with SMC, it has a large pond/small lake that is the home to many water-type creatures – especially bull frogs. Eddie lived for two things – catching bull frogs and professing his undying love for me.

I’m not sure how I became the object of his juvenile obsession, but I would have gladly shared the wealth with any of my female co-campers. Eddie used to follow me everywhere. He would go out of his way to get as close to me as possible. He’d chase me multiple times a day from the chapel or mess hall back to the girl’s side of camp. The cabins were my refuge. He put me in tears so many times that first year at camp that our counselors has to impose a “restraining order” on him. He was not aloud to sit by or near me, but he’d still find ways to torment me.

And this wasn’t just a first year thing. This went on for YEARS! Every year, I’d get to camp and start praying that The Frog Man wouldn’t be there – no such luck. The “chasing” did eventually let up and I developed this amazing skill of ignoring him, but he still continued to be my shadow. I remember on one occasion, we were going on a hay-rack ride and he came and sat close by. The male counselor sitting next to me (yes, I had to have male counselor body guards) reminded him he wasn’t allowed to sit next to me. Frog man responded by saying “I’m not sitting NEXT to her, I’m just sitting close enough to her so I can LOOK at her.” Oh, brother!

I know I should be flattered, but it was creepy. No girl in grade school should have to deal with a “stalker”. And thanks to my early on experience with The Frog Man, I avoided boys a whole lot longer than normal. I’m still not sure why me? I have always been a magnet for guys weird guys (oh, yes, there are more, but we’ll save those for a later blog).

So where is The Frog Man now? WHO CARES! Once I hit my teen years, I started attending another session of camp and was finally free of the Frog Man. Actually the last time I heard, I think he had either joined the army or was in jail or both…I don’t know for sure – something with a lot of structure. I’m sure if he’s in jail, it’s for stalking someone or ignoring a restraining order.

Scary Movies

Okay, so last night I went to go see The Grudge (which, can I say that this link even freaks me out) with some friends after church. I know there are some out there that weren’t that impressed, but since I’m so jumpy, I was completely freaked out. What really got me was the scene of the lady in her bed. I won’t share details, but it only seems logical to me when you’re scared to run and jump in your bed and hide under the covers. Not sure about this anymore. If you’re not safe in your own bed, where are you safe?

Now if you’re like me, when you see movies like this, you’re sitting there saying – out loud – “what are you thinking?!?” No wonder people in scary movies get killed. They’re STUPID! This was just reinforced last night, so here is my brief attempt at a guide of “how not to get killed in a horror movie.” Feel free to add to the list.

1. If you hear a scary noise, do not go “check it out” especially by yourself and without some weapon to protect yourself.

2. Do NOT take the stairs. Don’t go upstairs, don’t go down stairs, don’t go in the stairwell. Bad things happen when stairs are involved.

3. Never return to the scene of the crime. When you know that something bad has happened in a house, a school, anywhere - don’t go back there! If you were fortunate enough to get out the first time, you probably won’t be the second time.

4. Don’t date someone who seems to have involved themselves in some horrific quest. The significant other ALWAYS dies.

5. If you ring the doorbell and no one answers, but the door is unlocked, don’t go inside.

6. NEVER under any circumstances go up into the attic or the down into the basement. Bad things happen in attics and basements.

7. Never leave the office late at night by yourself. Actually being at work late at night by yourself is never a good thing because that “night watchmen” hired by your company to keep you safe will not protect you and most likely, will die himself.

8. Stay away from the creepy kid. No matter how sorry you feel for the kid, the creepy kid will always be your demise (especially if it cries like a cat!)

9. If scary things have been happening to you all evening, do not open the door. No matter who you think it is, DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR! It will always lead to your demise.

10. If you think there is something in or under your bed, don’t look. RUN!!!!!!!

Some Day My Prince Will Come...

Me & Kim at the Halloween Party

Unlike my Disney look-alike, this is not a song that I go around singing right now. This thought has spurred on my top 5 reasons why my “Prince” is MIA…

1. He ran off with a dwarf. It wouldn’t be the first “prince” in my life to do that.
2. He clothes lined himself riding his white stallion through the forest and developed amnesia.
3. He was riding his white stallion across I-40 and got hit by a Mack truck.
4. He’s directionally challenged and lost in the woods somewhere
5. He married Sleeping Beauty. He prefers blondes.

Drunk Pumpkin

In honor of the upcoming holiday (and the fact that I've had nothing else to post lately) I've decided to add my favorite Halloween picture ever! I love the drunk pumpkin. Absolutely disgusting! Isn't it great!?!?

Man + Iron

I've decided that this is what I really need...a man that irons! I feel like I'm pretty "domesticated", but I can't iron to save my life. I end up ironing more wrinkles into my clothes than were there in the first place. Plus half the time the iron ends up staining my clothes somehow (thank you Beau Bailey for sharing with me how to resolve this issue - now I just have to figure out how to get the water out of the iron). AND, what I forgot to add to this blog originally, I also burn myself 90% of the time (I have a scar on my finger right now matter of fact).

So, if you are a single male that can iron looking for a single female that can cook, give me a call. We might be able to work out some sort of deal.

It's Getting Hot in Here...

I have the noisiest neighbor in the world! Always pounding on the wall and playing their stereo loudly… (Just kidding!) Actually, I adore my neighbors. For those of you who don’t know, I live right next door to friends from church, Tams and Kat. Anytime you share walls with other people, you expect noise and it doesn’t really bother me (as long as I’m not trying to sleep) and my most recent neighbors are very courteous in this area – until last night.

Let me set the stage for you. You see, Kat and I share a wall, so I can usually hear her stereo, but she always turns it off before I go to bed, so it’s usually not a problem. Last night, I was starting to head to bed about 10:20ish and Kat’s stereo was going. I still needed to read my Bible, so I thought “I’ll do my reading and if it’s still going when I’m ready to go to sleep, I’ll just call and ask her to turn it down.” No big deal really, until I started to read. I hadn’t been paying attention to what she was listening too. Normally I can’t even tell – I just hear the bass. But last night as I start reading and I find myself distracted by the words to the song she was listening to… “It’s getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes…” It really takes away from your personal Bible study when you have a song like that going through your head. So, I decided to go ahead and call.

I guess our friend, Jayna, was over there visiting because she answered Kat’s phone. I was a little thrown at first and wasn’t sure who I was talking to, but our conversation went something like this:

Jayna “Hello.”
Me “Hey, it’s Stacey”
Kat (in the background) “Tell her we’ll turn it down”
Me “I don’t want to be the gripey neighbor, but ‘it’s getting hot in here’”
Jayna “you can hear that”
Me “yes, and it wouldn’t be so bad, but I’m trying to read my Bible”
Jayna (laughing to Kat) “She’s trying to read her Bible and now she wants to ‘take off all her clothes’”

At this point all conversation erupted into laughter and I’m not sure what any of us said.

So, thank you girls, for keeping my evening less than boring!

Not Commonly Known

This took me a while (I mean like weeks) to come up with because I was trying to come up with one for each year I've been on this earth (see item #3). If you know me well, you probably know a lot of these. Definately more about me than you ever wanted to know. Oh, and I can't take credit for this myself - I got the idea from Lindsy.

1. I am terrified of Ferris wheels.

2. I’m actually the middle child in my family. My older sister died shortly after I was born.

3. I’m 30 (which I know isn’t a surprise to those who know me well, but I’ve been amazed lately at the number of people who think I’m younger than that. Guess I should enjoy it while it lasts.)

4. Though I have been overseas several times, I have never crossed the Mexican or Canadian borders.

5. I CANNOT stand the smell of sauerkraut.

6. I was named after my sister’s babysitter, Stacey Niles.

7. I got the scar on my chin by falling into the coffee table while chasing my cousin, Darren (who was pretending to be King Kong), when I was 4.

8. I don’t like angel food cake.

9. I’ve only had 1 speeding ticket.

10. My middle name is Kaye. I received this name because it rhymes with Faye which was my sister and mom’s middle names and my mom got her middle name from my grandmother’s cousin, Clara Faye.

11. My favorite doll when I was little was named Jenny. Actually, I named everything Jenny, but she was “The Jenny Doll” and I still have her.

12. I don’t like melons of any kind (watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew, etc.)

13. My career aspiration when I was little was to be a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader when I grew up.

14. When I was little, I used to walk on the knuckles of my toes because I also wanted to be a ballerina.

15. I spent a lot of time in detention growing up because I talked too much (this changed in the 6th grade when we moved and I stopped talking in school).

16. I have some strange candy preferences: 1) I like the regular size Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, but not the miniatures, 2) I prefer orange Smarties and will save them for last, and 3) I will usually only eat the white conversation hearts (the chalky kind) and leave the rest.

17. I don’t like the color orange (and this has nothing to do with any school, I just don’t like the color).

18. I’m intimidated by most people and I have to really work at it to keep it from controlling my life.

19. My first pet was a poodle named Curly.

20. I had a run-in with someone who broke into our house when I was nine.

21. I don’t like my nose.

22. My first crush was in the first grade on a boy named Newly Hutchinson (which coincidently, I ran into again in a math class my freshman year of college).

23. I constantly had nightmares about vampires until I was in my mid twenties (they strangely quit once I started watching “Buffy”)

24. I like to build things/put things together and would love to learn to do woodworking someday and design furniture.

25. I don’t like Pepsi because of a whole “spewing it out my nose” incident.

26. I almost got kicked out of kindergarten (no joke!)

27. I have this unusual talent for making pig noises that you have to hear (and see) to believe.

28. I snow ski, but have never water skied.

29. My parents used to have to put the couch in front of the door because I would walk in my sleep and had been known to leave the house.

30. I don’t chew gum

Arachnophobia

a·rach·no·pho·bi·a, n. An abnormal fear of spiders.

I don't know what I've done to deserve it, but it seems that the spiders are out to get me. My surroundings keep getting infested with them and it's making me paranoid! I of course like most people don't like spiders and will kill them if I need to, but I'm starting to develop a fear of them.

If you were around me at all in early July, you heard about my spider "infestation" in my office. For those of you who didn't, I came into the office one Monday morning to and went to answer the phone in my office when I noticed a little tiny black spider on my phone. I reached for a Kleenex to dispose of it when I saw one of the most terrifying sites - my Kleenex box was COVERED with hundreds of tiny black baby spiders. It seems a momma spider decided that my Kleenex box would be a good place to give birth. Since it took place over the weekend, they had since dispersed throughout my entire office. It was awful. They were on my monitor, inside my phone, in my candy dish...EVERYWHERE! Thanks to our exterminator, they were gone in two days and haven't come back since.

But now I have a new problem. Every since we left Pettijohn last weekend, I have started finding medium size albino spiders all over my car. Never more than one at a time, but on a regular enough basis, it's becoming un-nerving. I'll be driving along and they'll come crawling down my windshield or up my window, or come crawling out from underneath the door handle. So far, they have always been outside the car, but it's just a matter of time I'm sure. First of all, I've never seen albino spiders - so it makes me think they're some sort of mutation. But they're really starting to freak me out. Part of me thinks if I would go wash my car, they might go away - or - they might move inside to take cover. I don't want that.

HELP!!!!!!!!!!

IM is BAD!

Like many things, good and useful things in our lives can be misused for bad – IM being one of these things I’m convinced. I’ve actually felt this way for a while, but an incident yesterday at work has convinced me of this. Let me share.

Monday afternoon, an IM popped up on my screen from one of my co-workers relaying information about an event in the office on Friday. Since the message was talking about me, I assumed it wasn’t for me. So I replied stating that I thought it went to the wrong person. She replied back stating it had. At this point, I felt like I was being talked about behind my back, but not wanting to jump to the wrong conclusion I blew it off. I guess guilt got the best of my co-worker because about half an hour after the original message, I received an IM from her asking me to forgive her because she had been venting to another co-worker about how frustrated she had been that I told her I couldn’t help her with a project on Friday and she didn’t want me to think that they were gossiping about me. (No, they were just talking about me behind my back – just as bad).

First of all, once I asked her she admittedly said she wouldn’t have even said anything to me if she hadn’t sent the message to the wrong person (lesson #1, if your going to bad mouth someone via IM – might want to be sure you sent it to the right person). But what really bothered me is that she failed to get the facts before she vented her frustrations to someone else. You see, if she had come to me first, she would have seen a whole other side to the situation. What she failed to see was that I had been helping her out all week, she just didn't realize it because it wasn't in ways she was aware of. So when she asked for my help with a specific project, I wasn’t being difficult, I honestly didn’t have time because by this point I had to finish a big project of my own. I was so hurt that this person looked to her own self-interests instead of looking at the big picture and realizing I had in fact been helping her out all week and not recognizing the sacrifices I had made because of it. And to top it off, she made me look bad to another co-worker for no good reason.

But (and here is my point), it made me take a long, hard look in the mirror. How often have I been guilty of the same thing? Using IM to vent to someone instead of either keeping it to myself or discussing it with the person that wronged me? I’ve been trying for a while to be careful about behaving this way because I have come to view IM as the “water cooler” of the new millennium. IM has for too long been used by some in our office (at times, self included) to “vent frustrations” or even talk about someone else (because it isn’t gossip if it’s true you know). Like I said, I’ve felt this way for a while and have been working on it, but I think God used Monday’s event to open my eyes and be extremely more cautious about behaving this way. Definitely not a good experience, but a definite lesson learned.

I'm STILL Bored

Since I'm still bored, I was going through my "favorites" and came across this website a co-worker shared with me while she and her huband were trying to name their first child. This guy's comments make me laugh, so I thought I would share. http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/index.html

I'm bored

Theme for the Day 

For the first time in so long I don't remember, I have NOTHING to do. Since I have to be here, I'm trying to be productive and clean out some of my network folders and I came across this cartoon. Sorry, it's not the clearest, but it's very appropriate for my day - so I posted it. The End.

Eye Liner By Candle Light

 


My morning didn’t get off to the best start and the only reason I’m not in a bad mood is because the whole situation makes me laugh when I think about it. As those of you who live around here know, we had a storm move through this morning.

Now I’m not sure if it was the storm that woke me up, or if it was my bladder that was about to burst, but nothing annoys me more than waking up and having to go to the bathroom anytime close to when I’m supposed to get up, so the first thing I did was check the alarm clock. Problem. I can’t see the alarm clock. We have no power. At this point I’m thinking “I need to set my travel alarm so that I don’t over sleep.” So, I reach for my travel alarm and go to set it. Lovely! It’s 6:04 a.m. Not only do I not have power and have to go to the bathroom, I don’t have to be up for at least another 30 minutes and there is no way I’ll be able to go back to sleep now.

At this point my need to go to the bathroom over-rides my frustration with the fact that I’m being cheated out of sleep so I make my trek to the bathroom. Another problem. My bathroom is pitch black and I’m having trouble finding the toilet. Since I have no idea where my flashlight is, I decide to light a candle and I start the search for matches. Luckily, I remembered where I left the matches the last time I used them and it didn’t take long to find them – striking them was another story. I could NOT get them to strike for anything. After the fifth attempt on the third match, we have flame. So, I light a candle, take care of the business at hand, find my flashlight, and go back to bed.

As I suspected, going back to sleep wasn’t going to happen. Eventually, I just got up, lit several candles in the bathroom and made a feeble attempt to try to get ready. You know, putting make-up on by candle light is an interesting experience. I really didn’t want to leave my house looking like a 10 cent hooker from the corner store, so I was extra cautious not to apply too much. But the eye liner was the best. Not only is it kind of hard to put eye liner on when you can’t see very well, but to top it off, I had the hiccups – BAD. I’m sure any female reading this knows what I’m saying. It’s a steady handed job and hiccups make that difficult.

This whole experience this morning got me to thinking about how much we depend on electricity. Since our hot water heater is electric, we only have as much hot water as was in the tank already (luckily enough to wash my hair). The hair dryer was out of the question, but my first thought was to dry my hair at work. Of course, the thought of leaving the house brought about a whole new question – “how do we get out of the garage?” Yes, I know about the emergency release on the garage door opener, but neither of us had ever used it and weren’t sure how difficult of a task this would be. And what about the refrigerator? How long can the power be off before the food inside starts to go bad? And forget cooking anything because neither the stove nor the microwave worked. The power also went off at work and the server was having some issues. You would have thought the world was coming to an end by the way some of my co-workers reacted to the fact they couldn’t connect to the server or to email. It was only 8:30, the day wasn’t a total loss yet. It’s amazing how big a part electricity is to our every day lives – maybe too big of a part. But you know what? Though I’ve often thought I would enjoy living a simpler life, I don’t think I want to live one that simple. I have a new found appreciation for electricity!

Oh, by the way, the electricity finally came back on around 7:30 a.m., so we missed another opportunity to try the “emergency release” feature on the garage door. Maybe next time.

6 Saltine Crackers

Did you know that it is impossible to eat 6 saltine crackers in less than a minute without taking a drink? Blake Blackwell shared this fact with us this weekend and I didn't believe him - so yesterday at work, I tried it. Guess what, he was right. It took me 45 seconds to eat the first 3 and I tried to eat the last 3 all at once to make it in the 15 second time slot, but no luck.

Red Neck Floaties

This past Friday morning I’m at work and on hold with AT&T customer service and since I had nothing better to do at the moment, I started reading the “Fill-Air” inflatable packing that came in the box with the cell phones we just ordered when I noticed something that made me laugh. On the bottom of this “bag of air” was this symbol that states that you are not to use it as a flotation device. Now, this little bag of air isn’t much bigger than my hand. Yes, it would float, but what idiot would begin to think that this little bag of air would actually be useful in saving their life in an emergency? Seriously, if I was standing at the edge of a pool, and someone was drowning, I don’t see my self saying “here I’ll save you!” and tossing them this bag for them to use to stay afloat. The thing is, if it’s printed on the bag as one of many cautionary items, then at some point some redneck idiot got the bright idea to duct tape them to their child’s arms for their child to use as floaties in the cement pond.

This got me to thinking about other “warnings” I see printed on day-to-day items. Take for instance, toner. You know the powdery stuff that you put in copiers and printers. Our toner bottles at work say, “Do not eat”. Now what intelligent person would look at a bottle of toner and think “you know, I’m kind of hungry and that toner sure does look good. I think I’ll go get a spoon.”? HELLO! But again, if it’s printed on the bottle, then someone had to have tried it and probably tried to sue the company when they were surprised by the unpleasant outcome (I’m sure we’ve all heard about the lady who sued McDonald’s because she spilt hot coffee on her self, hence the phrase “caution HOT” now seen on their coffee cups.)

Yes, I have done some stupid things in my life – tossing a cigarette lighter in the fireplace to try to get my logs to light being at the top of this list – but I am generally a sensible person and I should have known better. I should have thought through the process and used what little I know about physics and gravity to know that when that cigarette lighter got hot and exploded, it was not going to stay put and it would go somewhere (thank goodness I had the common sense to close the screen to the fireplace). Scientists say that we only use 10% of our brain, but seriously – I think some people are using the wrong 10%.

Feeling Left Out

Well, I'm giving this "blogging" thing a try. I was feeling left out because it seems everyone I know is starting up a blog and since I enjoy reading everyone elses, I figured I'd give it a try too. Don't expect much. I probably will only get around to posting once a week or so and most of the time, you can guarentee it will be fairly random. So, this is it for today until I get everything figured out. Have a great weekend!