Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Old Crazy Dancing Lady Returns to the Gym

I think I’ve written about the crazy dancing lady at my gym before, but for those who haven’t heard about her, I’ve got this OLD lady (late 60’s, early 70’s) who comes to my gym and “shakes her thang” all over the place. I swear she used to be a pole dancer somewhere and who knows how many times she’s had to replace her hips based off the way she moves. It is a toss up on who is my favorite person to watch…Old Crazy Dancing Lady or Middle Aged Anorexic Ballerina.

My gym attendance hasn’t been the greatest lately and even at that, OCDL and I haven’t always been on the same workout schedule. BUT last night, she was back. She was sporting jazz shoes, dance hose, shorter than Daisy Duke’s short shorts (with butt cheeks hanging out) and a tight black crop shirt. The outfit alone was enough to make you snicker, but to see her dance. I wish I could describe it properly. There was a lot of shimmying. It was almost like Dirty Dancing meets Golden Girls. It was all I could do not to laugh out loud. Oh, and at one point, she decided to make use of the chin-up machine. I think the chin-up machine might have felt violated after she got done. And she LOVES to watch herself in the mirrors. That woman is all over the place.

Towards the end of my workout, I went to do crunches on one of those boards that hold your feet. Just as I’m walking over there, she walks in between the two boards that they have and begins talking to one of the fitness instructors. Well, there was no using it till she moved – which became evident wasn’t going to happen for a while – because she dances while she talks (the woman NEVER stops moving) and I didn’t want that image in my face while I was trying to do crunches (plus there isn’t much room between the two boards and I thought it would be rude to ask them to take their conversation some place else so that I could work out). So I sit down on another machine waiting for their conversation to end.

The conversation was almost as funny as OCDL. She was telling the instructor that she didn’t go to bed to 5 a.m. because she was up all night dancing at some dance club. Also is telling the instructor that she was just out there dancing by herself and 5 guys came up and all started dancing with her (and she was demonstrating how she was dancing – again, Dirty Dancing meets Golden Girls). The whole thing was just hilarious to me. Too bad she’s not there when I am more often because watching her is much more distracting than watching the TV. Thirty minutes on the elliptical just flies by.

So there you go Lindsy, a new post. Sorry, it’s not that I haven’t had stuff to write about, but it’s stuff that I still need to keep under wraps for the time being (I don’t want to jinx it). I know you’re curious. You’ll just have to tune in later.

6 comments:

lindsy said...

STACEY! You know I hate when you do that, but I'll wait like everyone else. The post was funny. I have alot of OCDL in my Jazzercise class.

Vicki said...

Hahaha- love the nicknames you have for these characters! What gym do you work out at, b/c mine has the occassional freaks (such as the Old Over-tanned Anorexic Lady) but nothing like your dancing friend!!! Someday I will blog about all the crazy stuff that happens at the gym- until then, I look forward to reading more about the people at yours.

Suzy said...

Love the suspense, but I think I know some of the stuff. Can I be a bridesmaid. Just kidding. Wanted to see everyone's reaction. Tammy and I used to go to a gym that had a young anorexic chick (not as funny as an old one). It was no wonder the machines would always break down with the workouts she gave them. It looked very painful to me.

Stacey said...

Suzy! That was a secret. You have lost bridesmaid status now.

tams said...

I, for one, was THRILLED when I saw you had a new post. And it was hilarious, so that helped too. Thanks for updating. Please do it again! Can't wait for details....

Karen said...

I can't wait for details either!